This method of safe and defined speaker/listener roles can serve as a great starting place to ensure all parties are heard.
However, as time goes on, the process will become less rigid so you can find your unique way to express, listen and move forward.
Notice in the conversation, the couple discussing their spending didn’t actually get things sorted straight away, they just needed to start a constructive conversation.
They didn’t even change their spending, however, they were both able to express their concerns, feel understood, and agree to review their budget.
This kind of conversation will be hard at first and may not always achieve the result you hope for.
That’s OK – the point is to start talking to understand each other’s point of view so that you can work together.
If things get heated, take a break, reschedule and try again – focus on the problem, stick to the facts and try to understand the feelings.
At the end of the discussion, if it feels like there is an opportunity, it can be useful to share some positive thoughts about the discussion.