This is Manawa’s story, edited to keep her from being identified and to help you read. Quotes are Manawa’s own words. Names have been changed.

A couple of years ago, I was in a bad place. I broke up with my partner and lost custody of my kids. My mental health had taken a hit. I let my car go because I couldn’t keep up with the expenses. Without a car, I had to rely on buses or walk long distances just to get to school or visits with my children. I was doing good with what I could, but life felt like a journey full of challenges.

“I was kind of like losing my marbles…I was really educated in the last few years to understand life. No one tells you about life, you know. You’re figuring it out.”

The first time I applied for a Good Shepherd loan, I was turned down. My budget just didn’t work. At the time, I was paying a lot in rent each week, and I barely had enough money for other expenses.

About a year later, my situation had changed. I had fewer living expenses. I also needed a car more than ever. So I decided to try again. It took a lot of persistence on my end to get Good Shepherd to respond to my initial application, but I didn’t give up. To my surprise and relief, I was eventually approved for a loan to buy a car.

That car changed everything for me. It wasn’t just a vehicle — it was my ticket to freedom and stability. When I first got it, I was going through a rough patch with my living situation and ended up living in the car for a couple of weeks. I had chosen it carefully, making sure it had foldable seats so I could sleep in the back if needed. And it served that purpose well.

“Yeah, it’s just a car, but it was a safe place I could go. No one could kick me out, and I could take myself anywhere.”

With my car I moved to a little house near the beach, where I spent time healing and learning to live sustainably. I collected rainwater, used a generator and paid close attention to the rhythms of nature. Being by the ocean helped me calm my mind and process everything I’d been through. I used that time to reflect on my choices and figure out what kind of future I wanted to create.

“I had to go find myself, sort myself out and heal a bit from all my trauma. The car helped me on my healing.”

Over the past year, my life has transformed. My car has been an important tool for me to reclaim my life for the better, allowing me to get to school, visit my kids and travel into town for groceries and appointments. I now have 50/50 custody of my kids. I’ve moved to a rental closer to town. 

I’m nearly finished with a diploma in accounting. It’s something I am very passionate about, and I’m excelling in so many ways. I’ve just been offered an exciting internship to become an accounting technician. I know a good career will help ensure my kids don’t have to go through the same things I have been through. I’m proud of the progress I’ve made and the example I’m setting for my kids and others.

“From the low point, I am now passionate about teaching and inspiring others to learn and grow too.”

I’ve also been able to show up for my family and my community in ways I couldn’t before. I’ve traveled to tangi to support my family. I’ve been able to connect with my whakapapa and even contributed to research about my family history. 

I am feeling really positive about life these days, which is so different from a year ago. Having faith and belief in myself has made a world of difference. I love helping others to feel the same way. Looking back now, I can see that all the things I went through were meant to be. They’ve helped me find my path.

“Now I know who I am. I stay more confident and stronger in myself and what I want, rather than being the flock following the flock.”

The support I’ve received from Good Shepherd has been life-changing. I’m so grateful for the chance to rebuild and create a brighter future. Today, I’m learning to enjoy life rather than just endure it. That’s a gift I’ll never take for granted.