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Your financial situtation

Before launching into a conversation, it is important to understand how you feel about your own financial situation.

Money can be a complex topic, and in relationships, there are many aspects to discuss and understand. It is important to first work out what you need financially to feel confident and secure within the relationship.

Money conversations tend to be ongoing, so it is unlikely all of your questions will be discussed in the first conversation. 

It can be useful to pick and choose where to start – below are some questions that will help you work out how you are feeling about your current situation and clarify what you want to know, and what money conversations may be most helpful.

Start by answering
these questions

How would you describe your financial situation – are you happy with it?

Do you have access or can you get access to your shared money?

Do you know how much money or debt you and your family have? – including debt from previous relationships

Are you happy with the amount of money you contribute to the household finances?

Are you happy with the level of access, control or input you have over the family money and financial decision ­making?

Are you comfortable to have conversations about money with your partner?

Considering all the information from the questions above – what have you learned about your financial position?  

What would you like to achieve by talking to your partner about money? 

Write down a couple of goals you want to achieve and keep these in your mind when you are ready to have a conversation.

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“It is great to have the strategies and challenges come together so that you are learning together, sharing together and discovering together”

– Toolkit user

Good Shepherd NZ in partnership with Dr Ayesha Scott
AUT Finance Department

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Copyright © Good Shepherd NZ and AUT, 2022.


The information, content and materials provided in our Healthy Financial Relationships Toolkit is for general informational purposes only and does not take into account the financial situation and/or particular needs of any person. Before making important financial decisions, you should seek professional advice if possible. This Toolkit contains links to other third-party websites. Such links are only for the convenience of the reader, user or browser. Good Shepherd NZ and AUT do not endorse the contents of third-party sites.

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You’ve completed part one of our Healthy Financial Relationships Toolkit – preparing for the conversation. 

We hope you’ve gained a better understanding about money and you’re feeling prepared.

If you’re ready to take the next step, to begin a conversation about money with your partner, get started with part two: talking about money.

Part two: talking about money

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STOP - Please confirm your eligibility

We provide loans for essential items but not for cash, vacations, or normal household bills like food or future rent.

To apply for one of our Good Loans you must be: